Glad to hear you have a day program though to keep you occupied during the day, but I know how going home with it is so hard. As miserable as a therapy session might sound, remember that your T can really be your lifeline at times like this, but it is hard for him to throw you a rope if you avoid seeing him.

If you do get to the point of making a decision about ECT, PM me and I'll try to lay out the pros and cons for you. It is very, very important that you make an informed decision. I've gone through the process twice with positive results, but there can be some very serious long term problems for some people. Just don't go into it blindly.