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Apr 07, 2012, 06:50 AM
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Member Since: Oct 2010
Location: Michigan
Posts: 6,543
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Hi ~ You don't say how old you are. Am I correct in assuming that you're in your late teens? Or am I totally wrong? 
I have a feeling that you're very bothered by the fact that your brother may be gay. Is it because you're Catholic? Is it because you find it offensive or both? Please remember that he didn't CHOOSE to be gay --- he was BORN that way. No one would choose that life -- it's a life of hiding, torment, mental anguish, uncertainty, self-loathing for awhile, and that's just a FEW of the emotions they feel! So being gay isn't a choice! And he CANNOT just "turn straight" if he wanted to. It doesn't work that way.
You say you've been looking for drugs for a long time. Why? Are you trying to dull the emotional pain? It won't work. It will always still be there. I'm a recovering alcoholic/addict and doing drugs/alcohol doesn't work. All it does is get you addicted -- and that's a life of torment and hell.  All it does is lead you on a path to death. It WILL kill you, and some quicker than others. Whatever emotional problems you have are NOT so serious that you should put your Mother thru THAT KIND OF PAIN.
Please see a therapist. Ask you Mom about it --- tell her you need to see a good therapist about some issues that are really making your life difficult. Make sure she knows it's not just a "teenage angst" thing. You need to talk to someone and the sooner the better. I wish you the very best. God bless and please take care. Hugs, Lee
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