I've been having those thoughts again today. Earlier I felt resigned to it. Not sure how I feel now. I wish I could talk to you but I don't even know what I'd say. And I think I know what your advice would be - but I HAVE! It seems to be working on what I'm doing, but more and more feelings keep coming up - does that happen sometimes? Is that normal? I feel like my mind is being flooded with negative thoughts - but they're all very real problems. It's hard not to feel hopeless. I broke down at the farm today, couldn't stop crying. This isn't supposed to happen now I'm medicated! It almost makes me want to be a zombie again. Someone tried to cheer me up but she just couldn't have understood, she was all 'get into that fighting spirit and push yourself!' and I was just like '...' - people think it's so easy. I used to remember back when I could think like that, back when I thought I was kinda depressed. This is not the same thing. People can have the best intentions yet be so patronising. Thank you for never patronising me.