Well hello,

I am new here. My name is Kyle, and I am a 20 year old man, a father, and a husband. Doing rather well in the world. A big change for me, but now I am worried.

I was diagnosed with general schizophrenia about 4 years ago, when I was 15 or 16 years old. Most of it was me over-amplifying the symptoms for time off school. Anyway, After about a year I realized that my symptoms weren't as bad as I thought, and I stopped taking my meds, and the symptoms went away completely. I spoke to my psychiatrist, and he told me, the symptoms either are dormant, or it was a misdiagnoses. Not really sure what was going on. So, I went on my merry way, now have a 7 month old daughter, I have been married for almost a year now, and I am pursuing supervisor positions at a technology company that I am working for.

Here is the thing. Previously, when the symptoms started the very first time, I noticed weeks before the hallucinations started; I noticed extreme confusion, and inability to form sentences. Also the inability to keep eye contact with people when I was speaking with them. Which I am assuming was the onset of the illness.

Now, after two years of smoot sailing I am noticing once again I am having trouble saying what I want to say. I know what I am trying to say, but cannot speak it; like I don't know the language well enough to put together the sentence. Also, when reading aloud to my wife documents for proofreading; words I used to be able to express with ease, are now troublesome to even spell out. Which i also don't understand - I have always been an extremely advanced reader. When I speak with people, people who I have never been shy with talking to, I now cannot hold eye contact with them in conversations for more than a few seconds because I feel uncomfortable the moment I reach their eyes.

Life is becoming more and more stressful as these things slowly compound, and now that they are in my conciousness; I am quite frankly.....WORRIED

I am wondering if it's coming back, and praying to god at the same time that it's not; I have too much to lose from Schizophrenia again.

Any advice is greatly appreciated. I can be reached by e-mail at any time.

Kyle
Kaarst@cox.net