Yes our children learn by example, compassion of communication & assurance of future possibilities they choose. Be the parent, not their friend.

Also we as parents make our mistakes, apologize to them if warranted.

One day, with any luck, they will understand we did our best.

I also acknowledge that a fair amount of people had rough childhood's or really no childhood at all. Some of it they can't remember. Some do remember the trauma & struggle to move past it. I validate your pain.

Don't know if this helped, just my two cents.