How is you not letting go of the camera helping either? I understand you paid for it and picked it out. But why when you are attempting to get her to work on a marriage that you not once but twice had an affair on her, with the same women, not just let this go.

Ok, did your wife stay home and raise your children? I'm just curious what the deal was. Your wife is undoubtedly going to be angry with you. I honestly can't begin to imagine. I'm not totally taking her side here, but I wonder if you really realize the impact your actions had. Because you talked about your children not talking to you right now either. It seems like you are trying to rush things to just get back on track. They are going to need time tho. And you need to be patient if you want this to work.

Your wife very well may have done stuff wrong too, does it warrant an affair tho, I'm not sure if you understand that kind of betrayal. I kind of think the fact that she is even willing to discuss reconciliation is pretty good. I wouldn't.

What is bothering me is that you are sooo focused on yourself right now, I haven't seen you post about how you are worried about how your kids are handling this, except for how it impacts you. Same with your wife, you've talked lots about how it impacts you, are you really thinking about she has been impacted? Honest questions.

This might be best time to focus on them instead of just yourself. I'm not trying to be harsh, but from your posts that's what I can gather. I really am trying to help. I've tried to help you with your other posts so please don't take this as judgement. It's an observation.

What steps are you taking to save this marriage?

I read that you don't talk to your children about this, who are teens, because you don't think they need to hear you justify it. That you just talk to them about school and common place things. Could you talk to them about it, without justifying it? Talk to them about how they feel? Apologize to them sincerely? Idont know if you have, but just talking to them about commonplace things instead of the real issue, that would really hurt.

You also said it's 90% your fault, 10% your wife's fault. I'm glad you stopped demanding she do certain things to work on this. But the fact that you didn't go back to her until your lover left you, and you don't know how to heal yourself from being hurt by your lover, and you seem more focused on that than on your wife, says alot.

Is your wife just comfortable for you? Is it the children you are hanging onto this marriage for? I'm really confused, I think you are really confused, I bet your wife is pretty confused also.