ok, so i'm guilty of "blowing up" another thread & getting completely off topic... my bad!!! so yeah, here's a new thread for anyone who wants to discuss if/how they physically experience the episodes, the ups, the downs & in betweens of their bipolar disorder...


so glad it's not just me... it's exasperating being so mentally whacked & having so many physical symptoms that it's just altogether ridiculously overwhelming... it's no wonder so many of us are head cases from time to time... God, i am so glad i am not alone in this earthly world with all this crap!

when i'm manic, i can't sleep, obviously, i hardly eat... and i shop... non-stop.. i talk a thousand miles an hour & my insides are moving even faster than that... sometimes so much so that i get kind of an out of body experience of sorts.. i'm hyper-alert in every sense & it feels like i'm running even when i'm standing still..

when i'm depressed, it's just an overall intense heaviness to all my muscles.. i can feel it first in my face.. like the sadness is literally pulling my muscles and making them impossible to lift... there's, of course, the insane fatigue & apathy for everything... and i eat... and i eat... and i eat... sometimes my apetite disappears, but that's not the typical manifestation for me...

when i'm mixed... there aren't words for how horrendous that feels... like too much of everything bottled up and shaken up like any kind of carbonated soda... with no way to release the intensity bound up inside

and when i'm cycling... oh heavens, if it's possible, that's the worst of all... it's just a desperate "i want to crawl out of my own skin" sensation all over... and NOTHING soothes the... whatever it is that i'm feeling as i'm going through it... i really have no words to express what i experience physically when i'm actually in the process of cycling... it's genuinely awful