I know I haven't been here in a while but I am getting so depressed even more, the pain is too great for me to bare, I am so lonely so very lonely, I want to end it all. The hospitals here are horrible they treat patients like crap cause I had a friend go to one for 2 nights and she said it was so scary for her. I do have enough money to live on some campground and wait for my death. Here is the thing what if there is a good hospital that will see patients who feel like they want to be dead (like I do) but will treat their patients well even those who don't have a job, no source of income and no insurance. No I don't have enough money to get to Canada, just a few states away.
It sure beats the hell out of running off at some camp ground and wait my death but if there are no hospitals avail to help people who are like me (no income or insurance) then that is the only choice I have. I will not go to the hospitals in this city I live in all 3 surrounding counties are awful, they really do treat their patiences like dirt who don't have insurance.
But I really can't go on like this anymore, I am getting old (upper 30's) no family no hubby no kids nothing in my life to live for.
The pain hurts me so deeply.
Thanks for letting me get this out. I needed to, loneliness is just to hard to bare, to very hard.