I totally get what your saying. My thoughts on "normal" people are this...who is to say what is really "normal" anyway! Who made the decisions on what is the norm and not the norm? I feel like a social misfit myself, but who is to say I am? I don't like small talk either. I find that it is a waste of time. I would rather indulge in deep conversations but have no one to do that with because most people just say things that are surface related. I'm sick of societies opinions about people who are different than they are. Who are they to say we are the abnormal ones. Maybe its THEM. Maybe they are the abnormal ones! My thoughts and feelings are my own and i happen to think they aren't so crazy. But of course others might. I recently terminated with my therapist because I was sick of being viewed as some crazy misfit. I will go be a misfit all by myself. Its a lonely existence when no one else "gets" you. I do struggle with wanting things I know ill never have...day after day I find being this way of living depressing but have just come to the acceptance that its my life. I don't know the answer, but I understand the struggles.