Ok, I'll let you know up front where I'm coming from and why I say what I say. I'm not a pdoc, I'm not a T. My medical knowledge comes mostly from my career as a firefighter/paramedic. My psych knowledge comes primarily from what pdocs and others have told me about my multiple diagnoses. I have also done a lot of reading and online research to try to educate myself about my illness.

I don't think you're risking a serious infection. I've probably had worse infections than what you're risking every time I've had a cold sore. What concerns me is what you say about enjoying the pain. That's self injury by definition, regardless of how mild the extent may be. You've been doing it for eight years and it's never gotten any worse. Good for you. A lot of us here aren't lucky enough to be able to say that. I never cut at all until my late 30s, but it has become at times a serious issue. I hope yours doesn't become that for you.

You say you know it isn't a good thing. You called it an addiction. You were concerned enough to post about it somewhere, even if the SI forum isn't where you wanted it. You say you're worried about whether the habit signifies something. I don't know your level of education, but you sound like an intelligent person. Aren't these things all valid reasons to consult a mental health professional?

Self injury isn't something I'd wish on anyone, and mine is pretty mild compared to what some of the other members here have to deal with. I sincerely hope yours never gets any worse. Please get professional help to make sure you're ok. Keep yourself safe.

Just my opinion as someone who has to live with this.

Stay safe.