2bme, anger is also a part of PTSD, all the emotions are. And yes it can be a tremendous urge to express. If you can run, or do something very physical that does help a lot. Yes, while before you used alcohol to control it, it doesn't really work but finding something where you can physically exert yourself can help you burn it off.

And if you need to vent, do it here as well, that way you have someone who can listen as well.

So far you are doing everything right and talking about what your noticing is good too.
I can't promise you wont snap at family members, can you at least talk to your mother and tell her that it may happen as you are working through PTSD? I did that with my husband and while it took him time to understand NOT to absorb my anger but to just allow me to let it out, he has gotten the hang of what it means.

Now I am at a point where I am more aware of it and I am trying to work on not letting it happen, it isn't easy, often it just pops out and I have to appologize afterwards and then tell myself consciously to try to talk it out instead of responding in anger.

Remember, with PTSD everything is magnified so you have to be prepared for that but it will lessen as you work through it. If you know this going in, you can avoid feeding into it and work through everything better.

I have come to realize that the emotions that are involved with my early years are often stronger but it doesn't always mean things were worse, these memories are from a child who could have been more frighened at the time. Remember that you are older now and need to find a part of you that comforts yourself while you work through all of this. I wish someone had explained this to me, I am going on hindsite now and I would have done better at not feeding into it with being more afraid during the experiencing of the memories including the emotions.

You are doing good so far, as I said, try to use physical exertion/exercise of some kind to help you with the anger.

We are here and listening,

((((Hugs))))
Open Eyes