yes, i escaped my family when i was 21. picked up and left the state. I would go visit now and then. get together for christmas or other holidays. my family was very abusive and toxic. I have ptsd from childhood abuse. it took getting away from them to heal. The thing now is, I can pick and choose the contact I have with them. They do not rule my life anymore. I can decide if i answer phone calls. I can decide if i want to attend family events. It is all up to me. To heal, I had to remove myself from the role I played in that family. I had to no longer buy into the guilt and shame of not fulfilling that role. I had to live independent of them and build new relationships based on my choosing and definition. Based on health, not the toxicity I grew up with. Either they fell in place with the newly defined roles in my life or I dont play with them. My mental health comes first.