Wow Perna, 35 years of therapy? Pardon me, but F*** that! I can't imagine it. This makes me wanna die more. Anyways, missdell - I am 22 years old (male) and I feel the same almost exactly as you. Being a hermit is all I have to look forward to, unless I just live with my family for the rest of my life, which I really don't want to do. I have had maybe 1 friend in my life, when I was 6 years old, and wtf good is that I was just a kid it was meaningless. I have felt and still feel totally worthless, helpless, lonely, miserable, and empty in my life. I hate everything about my life, and I don't see that changing. I'm so messed up, there's no starting over. I am glad for you that you still have some willpower to get real friends and do things for yourself. You still have a chance. I have no interests, I cannot "grab" an interest. For me, nothing in the world interests me. Everything is boring, and I don't even think I am myself, I am just a being that is controlled by this body deathtrap. I hate talking about myself but I just wanted to tell you here I am another person that can relate.