Thanks. Yeah, much of what you said is true. The part about the doctors working around me, well, no.. I would just have shortened or no therapy...both physical and psychological...very busy professionals. I can't do those long days anyway, even with someone driving (which is more stressful IMO) and would go into flare often...

The aspect of selling the house, well, yeah selling is another stress raiser to impossible levels, but if I freak out about them being in my home.. and it becomes "unsafe" because of it and I can't live here anymore????? My T postponed their first try at coming here because I shared these thoughts.. that they have risen again, grrr... IDK will find out tomorrow if there's a date for the assessment yet... and I'll have to tell him what's happening to me

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Of the double bind of having to try hard to prove to them you need their help to cope, when coping is all that you do from dawn until dusk. You almost need to demonstrate that you aren't disabled (by effort expended), to succeed at showing them that you are.

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EXACTLY EXACTLY EXACTLY... and it's that way with the lawyers too!!!