I am angry and bitter, it is unbelievable. He thinks it has all been my fault, all, to the last drop. Transgressions against him and the girls. As if I have done nothing good. He expects me to be so ashamed as to WANT on my own to not bother them forever. I cannot help thinking of the time the older one is in college - I would contact her then. He keeps telling me that he has been warning me many times over that my behavior would lead to this end. I bitterly think that I wish he simply booked an appointment with a doctor and led me there, a great many years back. Likewise with a family therapy appointment - not wait for me to do it for years, but go f*** ahead. Further, he holds me responsible for everything I did while manic, and I want a break. Cannot find peace.