suzzie, both posters have good advice here, because first you want to make sure that you don't beat yourself up while working through this. But the other thing to make sure that you remember is that abusers are the ones with the problems. I had to really work on this myself and it is hard to understand. You are obviously an empathetic person and you know this was wrong. But people who use and abuse have things about them that are deep issues, their problems. And yes many abusers simply do not care at all or truely feel guilty for what they do to their vicitims.

And there are all kinds of abuse and neglegence that takes place between human beings. Some abusers are actually victims themselves and take their anger out on other people.

I am so sorry that you had to endure this. But always remember, none of this is your fault and not all people abuse.

((((Gentle Kind and Caring Hugs))))
Open Eyes