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I understand what you are going through with this. I wasn't diagnosed until last year which was my first year of college.
I hate taking my meds. They make me nauseous, more anxious than I already am (got pills for that too), and give me horrible insomnia.
Days when I do not take my meds, I feel like the laziest person in the world or I feel like I surrounded by laughing gas (those are fun).
Sometimes I just want so badly to be normal. I don't want to have to work 10 times as hard just to pay attention in class and keep up with my assignments. I hate zoning out constantly and looking stupid when I'm extremely intelligent and creative.
You just have to keep in mind that the drug is to help give you what you need to succeed. Though you may not feel as free, you have the tools you need to get stuff done. Just try your best not to let the meds take away who you are.
And I don't know if this was any help at all, but I wanted you to know you aren't alone!
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Happy Birthday to Me.
“Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who could not hear the music."
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