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Originally Posted by Chihuahua
Wow that's sooo not cool!! I have kind of the same problem - only verbal recordings because I tend to get VERY loud and shout. But the thing that hits home is "my husband is my bigest trigger" I am a teacher and love the noise level in my class and yes the silly 9 year olds irritating the crap out of me when I'm down - I never go off at them, but when I step in at home when H is there or see him my mindset changes instantly. My husband has noticed this and commented on it (when we are between friends I am very loving) My T says I have to figure out why this happens. Can you honestly blame your husband as being a tigger????? Just curious.
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I see what you mean about not going off on people like you would do with your husband. I am the same way. I just tend to withdraw from people if I get triggered, except with my husband. I think it's just harder to find a place to escape when I am at home and he is right in front of my face.
My husband can be very hard on me and has a temper. I try my best to let it roll off, not take things personally, but -bam- I just get triggered and that's the end of the story. I've tried talking to him about things he can do when he sees me going downhill, but there's a part of him that always says why should I have to be loving when she's bipolar and not very nice. So, he gets mad and the cycle continues. Like I said before, we've done a ton of counseling and his temper and my mood swings are too much to make anything work differently.
It's not right that he gets the brunt of my illness, but that's just the way it is. If he was naturally loving and patient it would be easier, but he's just not built that way.