Woah, slow down, you definitely need a break sweetheart. You may just have to go back on some meds for a bit. Wow, you are in hyper control here. And you have no outlet for yourself in this picture you paint here. You need to make an appointment with a gyno and make sure your hormone levels are ok. You can't help it if your hormones are off and you need help with that.

You should see if you can get a mother's helper for a bit. You need someone to help take the load off of you for a while. You have to allow some down time for yourself, it is not fair to you and not fair to the children either, you know that. It is your responsiblity to take care of the mommy of the home here and stop pushing and worrying about every little thing here. And GUESS WHAT, IF YOU LET SOME THINGS GO, LIKE KEEPING THE HOUSE PERFECT? IT TRUELY WILL NOT BE THE END OF THE WORLD. You simply cannot be perfect here and you do need some down time. Two older children? Are they old enough to do some chores?

You need to provide for you in here sweetheart. You know that saying? "IF MOM IS NOT HAPPY NO ONE IS HAPPY!" Well, this is true, true, true. and you have to do something to help YOU be happy too.

Sit and plan what you can do to make that happen. NO MORE BUTS HERE, you have to do this.

Now, calm down, motherhood is a big job, you are the CEO of that family and deserve a break.

(((((Hugs))))
Open Eyes