Quote:
Originally Posted by johnf22881
I just wanted to add something else to this thread to keep myself aware of what is going on. I finally started to write in a journal today and noticed another element that I need to change. There have been many times that I have let people influence what I think and how I feel.
The last job I worked at had a stigma that the owner was out to take advantage of you and that he was generally underhanded. People would come up with all kinds of stories and start all types of rumors, but for some reason I would let all these stories/rumors run wild in my mind. What I mean by that is I would actually take them seriously and start making up more nonsense. I would let every word people said, and what I added, stress me out and build to a level where I broke.
Things like this happen very often in my life, business and personal, and always end bad for me. It makes no sense to me that I would get all bent out of shape over things that probably aren't true and may not even have anything to do with me at all. I guess what I am saying is that it is amazing how your imagination, if you focus on the negative, can create such pain and cause you to act so foolishly.
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Not sure if this is a bipolar thing or not. I tend to be rather gullible. But it depends on the person talking to me. Like I can always tell when my dad is telling me tales just to try to get me. I know he's like that and I grew up with him, so I know when he's trying to pull my leg. But my husband is that way, too. But I can't tell when he's pulling my leg. He could tell me the sky turned purple and I would go check. LOL.
But I think that's just me.
On the other hand, it says people with bipolar have poor judgement (which causes risk taking.) But I know it causes other problems. Like I think that's why I had so much trouble holding a job. My reasoning skills weren't what I thought they were. It seemed perfectly reasonable to quit a job at a store because I didn't want to offer people the company credit card if they spent so much money. Or to quit because "it wasn't a real enough job." Or other stupid reasons like that. So maybe believing rumors has something to do with that.
As for them getting you all upset, I have repetitive obsesive and racing thoughts. When something upsets me it races through my head on a continuous loop and makes me feel like I'm going crazy. Sometimes these thoughts last only a day or a few hours, but more likely they can be troublesom for me for weeks, months, and even years. I used to replay all the bad things that happened to me in Junior high/ high school every night and couldn't sleep due to obsessing over the past. I did this until I was 25 years old! Thankfully all of that I've put behind me now, but whenever something bad happens I just find myself trapped in the loop.
So, I would say because it has a negative impact on your life, that's something you should tell your doctor.