dduck, your post is very thoughtful and caring. I am sorry that you are hitting one of those relationship bumps in the road. It's so hard especially when the other person is unwilling to participate fully. In this case, if the main issue is that you would like + physical intimacy and your wife is unwilling to discuss it, then there is definitely a problem.

I would continue to go and discuss just that with my T. Hopefully, you will be able to find a way to communicate how incredibly important this is to you with your wife in a way that she will understand. It could be one of many things. Actually, it is not uncommon for women to go through m-pause early or for hormonal imbalances to cause lack of drive; however, the fact that she is so adamant about not discussing it would be cause for concern (for me). That defeats the whole purpose of going to T.

***

My best friend(s) had the same exact problem in the intimacy dept. They both practice medicine, and actually one of them IS a T.

They went to T, together and individually. They have 2 wonderful children. Ultimately, they divorced

But they were both able to get out without being abusive, cruel or harmful (verbally or physically) with each other. Divorce is hard enough on its own without adding bad-decision making during the marriage to the pain of it all.

I wish you the very best! Please keep us posted.

Lightning, really?

From what I've read thus far, you are an intelligent person. You know the word "women" and "blabbing" in the same sentence is going to get you in the doghouse, FGS.

What you've written just sounds so angry. and bitter. I hope it's temporary, though. If you get to know us, you'll see that we don't all "blab".

And I honestly don't need to explain to you what the word connotes. You know what it means and the etymology of the word.

(unless you just read Charles Dickens or something, and you were so influenced by his brilliance, it's the first and only word that came to your mind ... but you can still offer an apology.)