Self. . .esteem is just that; how you feel about yourself. There is no "logic" or yardstick to measure by, no lessons in how to like yourself that requires you have "faith".

I enjoy feeling good and laughing and I have a great sense of humor. I make myself and others laugh, sometimes with my mistakes or viewpoint that is odd or different from other people's. I misunderstand something and try to explain what I was thinking versus the way it is and it can be comical. Instead of deciding I'm a "loser" for misunderstanding something or for blurting out about my mistake instead of hiding it, I embrace the way I think that incorporates things other people don't notice or think about and that gives them a fresh way of looking at the world they appreciate.

A very small example happened to my niece; we were visiting the FBI headquarters in Washington and were talking about plain clothes officers only she imagined "plane" and couldn't grasp the concept. We're explaining every which way until I finally saw her problem and spelled the word for her and she was able to shift the images in her mind (why would FBI agents wear special clothes on airplanes or when would they want to dress like pilots, what would that help? :-)

That happens in reverse, to me, often, and I also am the one who catches it then; that I have that problem helps me see other people's difficulties and help them, which makes me feel really good about myself. I can explain things well because I have a great imagination and vocabulary, too, and a huge repertoire of ways to word explanations so one is likely to ring the bell of someone having trouble understanding. That I think it is funny when I make a mistake like that (instead of panicking like my niece did; she burst into tears when she finally understood) and want to share my quirks with others so they can enjoy them too, also makes me feel good!

We all have ways and means to like ourselves and attributes to share with others. Sharing our wealth with others also makes us feel good (as well as just recognizing the wealth we have in the first place). But recognizing our self wealth requires we look for it and nurture it; it's not going to come beating down our doors (like friends won't either) looking for us.

We're rarely all one thing (negative) or all another; look at this list, remind yourself of when/which positive ones you have and figure out how to use them positively so they show up more than the negative aspects. Practice makes perfect :-)

http://www.gurusoftware.com/GuruNet/...al/Factors.htm