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not sure if this will be triggery for anyone, but thought I'd err on the side of caution....
I'm not sure what's going on with me.
I'm physically not feeling well. I'm in pain from fibro and arthritis. I'm exhausted from long, high stress days at work. I'm worn out physically and emotionally. I'm just sort of down all the time. Old stuff keeps surfacing. Grief for people long dead. Urges to SI pop up through the day.
I have a job I used to love, but it's got me so worn down lately I'm not sure I even like it anymore much less love it. I updated my resume last weekend. I'm thinking of sending it off, but I'm not sure changing jobs is really what I want/need. My life is not what I want it to be, but I don't know what I want it to be.
I don't want to give up my independence, but it's so damned lonely being single. I never, ever want to be in a relationship just to be in a realtionship, but... I'm still so stinkin' lonely.
I want to be happy. I want to enjoy life. I don't want life to be like this...
Ok, enough. I'm getting maudiline
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