Rather than hi-jack one of the other similar threads I decided to start a new one. Excuse the long ramblings....Just need to get this out. Feel free to provide feedback to my "thinking in writing."

I've been reading "Quiet" by Susan Cain which has lead me to do quite a lot of reading about the highly sensitive person. The more I read about it, the more I feel like "this is me."

We've been working on a lot of relationship stuff in therapy lately and it's been very difficult for me. There's been a lot of resistance and shutting down during sessions on my part. But with all this reading I've been doing, I am starting to wonder if part of the shutting down comes from this feeling that I am fighting some innate traits in myself - the introversion and sensitivity.

I really want to talk with t about this, but I am afraid she will ask "Why do you think you are highly sensitive?" (She already calls me a "deep thinker", so it's not a big leap.) Unfortunately, the best example I have involves t:

Several months ago, t said she often has people tell her they hate therapy. I replied "Then you better not read my journal." There was a split second where her face acknowledged that comment and just a tiny glimpse of hurt in her expression - which was immediately replaced with normal non-judgmental t and a comment about how she would never ask to read my journal. That was the first time I had admitted any dislike of therapy. Had I not been looking at t when I said it, I would have never seen the reaction - it was all nonverbal. I am guessing many people would have never noticed it - it was very subtle. And for all I know I could be misreading t's reaction completely. But it has bothered me ever since then. I've felt myself holding back on expressing anger with t and I think it is because of that split second.

I guess that's why I know this is the best example to give t - but I am terrified of the discussion that could result of this. I don't want t to think I am sitting there analyzing her every move. I don't do that. I also don't want t to start censoring her responses more. I need those bits of emotion coming through to help me keep talking.

Perhaps because I am more sensitive, I tend to think other people react the same way I do, when in reality they don't pay much attention to those subtleties?