Quote:
Originally Posted by Honeybun
I am wondering if other people have dealt with the following issues in therapy and if so, how were you able to overcome them.
As I have mentioned in earlier posts I have very little recall of my life before the age of 9. I know about the dysfunction of my FOO because it continued beyond this age, as did the neglect, emotional abuse and sometimes physical abuse. Since I started therapy a few years ago I get these images or thoughts or memories, I don't actually know what they are. They are disturbing. I am afraid to discuss them in session if I don't know whether they are real because if they are not what does that say about me? What is wrong with me to have made up such gross images?
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It only says that you have disturbing thoughts and images in your head. It doesn't say anything about you as a person at all. If they are disturbing you should talk about them.
I also don't think it really matters if they are real or not. Our minds can create a host of things in order to make sense out of things. It's not an unusual thing at all.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Honeybun
I realize that I can't determine if they are real unless I talk about them, but what if they are not? Or what if they are? They don't feel real to me as I think about them now, but they feel real when I am actively having them. Does that make sense?  |
Makes perfect sense. Whether real or not, the image gets etched in your mind and you have a reaction to it. It certainly can seem real.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Honeybun
I think I'm compelled to talk about them because they won't go away but the fear of discovering that I have made this up and therefore have these twisted phantasies is paralyzing.  |
It really doesn't matter whether you've made it up or not. It's in there. You should talk about it. You should see some of the stuff my brain has popped out (geesh! Stupid brain!)
my therapist said "this happens a lot, to just about everyone, it doesn't mean you are a freak, or that it actually happened. It's just in there, it gets to be in there and it's okay."
he's a smart cookie that man.