hello

First: I hope things go better than you think and also that how you feel at the moment...
and forgive my mistakes please, english is not my first language...
Well... the point is, from what I´ve read ,i´t seems you really know what you need in a profoundly way,I mean, and that´s good, but you are overwhelmed because you need more signals that tell you that what you think it´s rigth, in other words, and how you said it yourself you need support buuuut... Support it´s not only in people it is also in activities, in everyday things etc.
I´m not saying that you don´t need the people closest tou you, i´m just saying that maybe you could try to assist to I don´t know may be dance lessons or music lessons or something that like or why not love,because that it is very theraupetic and could help you to clear yourself,gain trust and the most important thing feel good .Perhaps firts you will feel strange or insecure for trying something new, but you will see that if you accude with a trusted teacher little by little you will be better...and not necessary has to be the activities that i propose of course but sometimes that makes you feel good.
Sometimes go to the theather or just a park or place that you like to stay for a moment .Otherwise I understand that you could feel worry about what people say, but you need to no tot forget that your menthal and emotional health it´s always first, so, let people talk, just do what you know inside, cuz for your words it´s seems that you think correctly it´s just that you need to feel better for being able to do things correctly,for your own wellness .It´s not easy I do know that, it could sounds that i say evrything so easy but the reason o that i´ts that you sound like me like three years ago in high schoo.l´ve been through a difficult situation, or maybe a mix of difficult situations, and over the last 4 years I have learned to know myself better,but above all to know what to do to stay better... i don´t know all your personal situation so may be you need other things first or something more professional but what I could tell you is that you could read something about dance therapy , music therapy or other alternative therapies and consider it together with your medical or phsycological treatment...and don´t forget evethough parents could want the best for you they could not know it ,but don´t worry for all what they said.Even if that´hurts, do what you know it´s better for you, soon or later they´ll understand , keep yor wings wide open , and be patient real growth hurts, but worth it, you are healing and also maturing it´s just a process no matter the difficulties inside... I hope something of all what i´ve said, will be useful and that I have given to urdenstand, sorry for my english :grouphug again ... :P