(((Haier))) you are in a tough situation. I'm sorry the others' in your group can' t see past their own pain to address yours. I REALLY think you should speak up. Seeing the pain sui** caused a former bfriend when he lost younger brother cemented my decision to never take that path. Your pain is probably the deepest imaginable. It could help those in your group to " wake up and smell the coffee " a little. There is a world outside THEIR pain and they have value. They eould be missed terribly like your brother and create a hole in the universe. Their actions and even words can cause pain. Sending you love. My dog sends kisses.