awww....warmed my heart. you're too sweet. i appreciate it.

i have thought about bringing this issue up, that's why i emailed the leader first. she does not think it's a good idea to bring it up. with survivors of abuse there tends to be this pattern where they flock to drama. we are so used to living this way, that's why we see cycles and patterns always being repeated, conflict is a magnet for us.
once a member expressed lack of support and i agreed and expressed my sincere opinion, i had barely joined the group and everybody got all huffy and puffy over it. i think that's when they started hating me. they don't like what i have to say a lot of the times. i feel like i try really hard to be positive and move forward with feelings, something i don't see in the group. i've tried talking to the other leaders also and i feel like they think either i don't belong or am not ready for group. sucks. maybe they are right. i do have a lot of issues. a lot. but like i said, i'm trying, i'm not just sitting trying to be miserable my whole life, i am trying to live. i just want to be at that point where life feels good. where all the ugliness can be put behind without the fear. thank you, i will be ok. just gotta keep telling myself this.