Don't apologise for rambling, venting helps. Others might come up with more suitable advice, but take it one day at a time. Can you talk to someone (a professional) about your anxiety? This might help to put things in perspective.

Your feeling that something 'bad' will happen might be due to you have gone through a rough patch and you want to feel prepared, thus the edgy/tense feeling that something is about to happen.

Talk to someone if you can and/or do the chores (washing etc.) or something you like maybe as an outlet (painting, riding, going out for a walk) so as to take your mind off the worry.

Anyway, sorry for me rambling this time. Good luck.