I think in the throes of emotion and working with T, we ourselves can forget it is not sometimes what T can do to improve things for us, but what we can do.

This is strange for me Skysblue - because for the first time ever I have asked my T for an extra session today - he has hurt me and I am on the brink of definitely quitting this time.

But I am gaining from reading your e-mail - I see things in black or white, it is either this or that kind of thing - if someone breaks my trust (which is what T did on Tuesday) that is it - sweep them aside and never see them again.

But what I am realising from reading your post, where I do not have the same emotional involvement with your T, is that many times in my life, I do set my standards high in how people should behave with me (think I set teh same high standards for myself and them beat myself up when I don't measure up) and yes sometimes I have then put up barriers to them and not let them in again. But does all the good stuff about someone get negated when they do one thign wrong? Who ultimately loses in this situation? Is it not ourselves? I wonder what can be gained by both of us, in trying to forgive and just use the opportunity to learn more about ourselves and how to improve our experience in life.

Hugs to you - Soup