Thread: How do you battle self-hate??
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Old Apr 26, 2012, 12:44 PM
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BrokenNBeautiful BrokenNBeautiful is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2009
Location: I live with myself. Because that is all I can depend on. Everthing around me changes.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Secretum View Post
Rose, I do this too. I picture myself failing a class or ending up homeless and it scares me so much, even though I'm nowhere near failing and I hopefully will never be homeless. And, of course, I think I deserve these things for being stupid and lazy.

I want to be a comedian.

But I have a terrifying idea that I am really not funny, I am just sick.

And it does not help that Bruce (roommate) does not appreciate my humor. (that's okay, but I need to be around ppl who do appreciate it, to build myself up.) I told some jokes to him yesterday, in fact some stuff that I thought he could relate to and he did not laugh---he just looked annoyed. Thank goodness I realize that part of it is because he's been so sickly lately, poor thing. But still... I need to be around ppl who can appreciate me.

I want to follow either this or other dreams that I have but I really relate to fear of failing and then not knowing how I am going to talk to myself then! "See, Billi, you dumb butt! You can't do nothing!"

I got to get a grip on that.

thanks for this,

Billi
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Secretum
Thanks for this!
Secretum