"I can actively work on improving myself and better managing my illness both for my own benefit and so that I am a better companion/mate ... for someone else down the road."

I like that one and 110% behind you!

(you are still a good person. You always were. Your behavior wasn't good).

If you don't mind, it's really hard reading passive / poor me / I want my (horrible) wife back simply because I have to start all over

If you choose to take good, kind, forgiving, loving care of yourself, I guarantee you, you will want absolutely nothing to do with her down the line when you start focusing on you.

Also you won't be worrying about having to "give her" all the things you literally sacrificed your life for. That IS a hard pill to swallow. But oh well. It's only STUFF. Clearly it didn't mean much to you before either because you were going to start fresh with someone else (simply on love and bread and wine)

I also guarantee you, once you start feeling better and healing, the last thing you are going to be is alone. I promise.