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Apr 27, 2012, 02:30 PM
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Member Since: May 2008
Location: Alabama, USA
Posts: 1,309
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Idiot17:
I use colour to brighten up my posts no matter how dully they may be written, no matter how depressing they may be, it just makes me happy to see a splash of colour around.
He is not my fiance anymore, nor will I be communicating with him. My efforts to appease him and try to help him to understand that it's time that we just moved on with our lives are wasted, I shall not bother wasting my breath.
Living well is everything I have ever lived and hoped for, I will continue to live and hope for that until the day that I die. I refuse to allow one person to put me down, to stop me from living my life the way that I want, and deserve, to live it. Furthermore, I am not one to back down to people who think that threatening me will make me give in to their insecurities and hopes of having their own behaviour justified.
Please do not let him, or my writings, anger you. Like I have said above, he is not worth that justification or reassurance that his actions are normal, or acceptable, behaviour. I understand why you are angry, but anger will only affect you, not the person that you are angry towards, or about. They will see no difference to their life, you will to your own.
I am not going to continue to discuss David, our past relationship, or anything involving him. Not because anyone has told me not to, but because I have one question for myself:
What do I gain from it?
The answer:
Nothing.
Harley, I questioned, and still question, my decision to move on so soon, not because I have doubts about us, but because I have always doubted myself. What made me decide that it was right, was that I should live my life, not hold myself back all the time, so I made the decision to take the chance on something that seemed good, and, funnily enough, it is more than good, it is incredible. I have more support from one person, than I have ever had from several people, I don't have to ask, speak, act a certain way, yet he'll know something is wrong and he will, without me asking him to, just hug me, knowing that is exactly what I need. That's just the start of it 
Lynn, you always talk so much sense! I really did enjoy reading your post, it made me smile somewhat, but tugged at my heart strings in other ways, also.
What you have said, I have been thinking all along, I was waiting for someone else to say it, to confirm what I already knew, thank you for doing this.
I read your part about me being his 'property', a friend made a comment not so long ago about that, which got me thinking about the relationship not so long before it ended. It was insightful, especially when we split up.
I like being me, I have noticed such a big difference in myself since I started being on my own again, I came out of my shell, became the person I love being, again. I will not stand for anyone trying to control me, if anyone wants to believe what he has to say about me, they can, that just proves that they really don't know me like they think they do, and that they are not worth my time, effort, energy, or compassion.
I have always come here to say how I have been feeling, to share my experiences, my knowledge, my hopes, aspirations, my failures, my successes... I have always seen PC as a safe place for me to come to say what's on my mind, positive or negative, it's the first place I come to share my words.
I know my reply to you hasn't been the best, Lynn, but I will send a better reply privately if you would like me to, I'm now going to have a relaxing evening, with my partner, enjoying each others' company, caring for my kittens who had their operations yesterday.
Thank you everyone for your insight, wisdom and well wishes. You're all such wonderful people
 
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