I've as of last week just started therapy for the first time, after battling with a feeling I associated as depression for a long time. My therapist, obviously after one meeting can't completely confirm, but says he sees depression in me.

I feel low, worthless, and really just empty. I'm fatigued, just tired 24/7. I have lost every ounce of aspiration within me, I used to try so hard to advance and succeed, but now I'm so afraid of failure that I have given up on trying at anything really. I'm putting myself through this, I blame nobody but me, is that bad? It's so much more than this, but most of my feelings of depression for 8 years now are heavily associated with a girl in my life. I've been madly in love with her for 8 years non-stop, she without actually doing anything makes my life a living hell but I put myself through it because I feel as if she is worth it. It's completely a unhealthy relationship but I can't pull myself away from her and I cannot imagine getting over her if I haven't already after 8 years...

I'm just lost, confused, and I don't know what to do

Everyday it seems to get worse, and I never feel good, or happy anymore

I just want to live...is that so much to ask for?