My god according to what u wrote weve got lots in common, though i dont even try to control myself when it comes to si. I find that my cuts are getting deeper and deeper and i feel like dying just now. I go to a T but it doesnt help much since i dont talk. So my life sucks. If u see a T speak your mind to him and then youll probably get help. And if your trying to control yourself DONT give in. Have self control. Cutting sucks. It so does not pay to do. Gluck with controlling yourself- i know how hard it is. But dont be a loser like me and give up. It so does not pay to get into anything messier.