For awhile I was doing really well about my drinking but lately it seems that I've hit another low. I'm not doing anything dangerous, like drinking and driving or binge drinking, but I drink all day long. Just enough to keep a bit of a buzz. Lately, though, I've been getting really horrible acid reflux and I wake up in the morning having panic attacks. I would really love some words of encouragement right now. I haven't been on here in a few weeks because I've been managing my life in balance with alcohol. I don't want to commit to going to meetings until I get completely sober, and I'm scared that I'll run into someone I know or that I'll seem silly showing up and being a doctoral student with alcoholism. I don't know how I can do that. I'm only 24 and I'm definitely a functional alcoholic. I go to work and school and don't seem to have any problems appearing "normal." I'm scared of how my body is being affected and I don't want to keep moving in this direction. Please, ANY words of encouragement or ANY stories you might share would be really helpful to me. Perhaps I should also mention that I drink because I have panic attacks and anxiety and that I started drinking because alcohol was a quick way to suppress the symptoms of anxiety, though I know it's a depressant, and in the long run makes me feel worse.