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Sounds like you see your mom for who she is. You asked what you are supposed to do with all of this? Being heard here might help. How are you feeling today? (You will never get her to validate how you feel so stop trying to get that from her).
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Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........
I'm an ISFJ
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