I was trying to start writing a short paper due tomorrow for one of my college classes when I suddenly flashed to this really negative thought/memory, and then I just started getting a bunch of negative thoughts about myself. I started getting the feeling like I do before I get stuck in my head and start emotionally spiraling....

It usually doesn't end well :/. I don't self-harm physically, but emotionally I end up submitting to my thoughts and throwing myself off cliffs and into brick walls at full force. I'm afraid that I won't be able to control it again tonight, because fighting it is just too hard sometimes. I've decided to give myself a break and just be okay with not getting my paper done tonight since if I were to push forward I would 100% get stuck for sure... These feelings feed off my force that tries to push them out anyways.

I've been talking about self-compassion in T, but I really don't know what to actually DO at these moments to stop beating myself up, when I'm not 100% in control of the random thoughts sprinting throughout my head.

How do I gain control? I was hoping to get some suggestions so I know how to combat this better in the future. I don't like being scared of losing to my own thoughts :/.

Thanks,
--CHANGEwillcome