Hello Switch,

I often wonder about this too. Throughout my life I always escaped through TV. My father was rather strict growing up and didn't allow me to go out to play so I often got lost in TV land. As I got older, I watched it less when I had a job and a "life" if you consider having a life was partying and drinking heavily.

Now that things have calmed down, and I have come to terms with my illness, got the therapy I needed, and the meds to help me, I find myself withdrawing back into TV land. I watch hours of TV and spend even more hours on the internet. There is no wrong doing in what I am doing because I look at it like this, watching tv is better than going out and drinking and doing drugs and making our illness worse.

Bi-polar is tricky. Our moods are low and we feel relaxed when watching tv, but its like our minds are always working overtime. I wonder if anyone else experiences this. Like right now, I am watching a tv show, but I am here writing posts on this site. It's like I'm satisfying both addictions!

I'm glad to hear you've gone out a few times with friends and such and have gotten out of the house. That can be really helpful. I was really starting to recover when I was in school and I had a reason to get out of bed and a place to go every day. Now that I graduated, I feel lost again and kind of retreated back into TV land and Internet World.

The only real joy I have right now, is my favorite tv shows and my internet gaming time. I also started reading a lot too. I don't know if that's a good substitute but at least I'm outside at the park or in my backyard when I read my book, not locked away in my tv "cave".

But escape into TV land, isn't that bad, I think. Maybe I'm trying to justify it because I can totally relate and am in the same place myself. I don't know. I feel like life is out there just passing me by while I'm at home with my tv.

Weird.

PlatinumHeart