Bathony, I can nearly guarantee you that if this guy is as considerate as you say he is, this will not alter his perception of you one bit. He would certainly not hate you if he knew. At worst, I would suspect that he ask (perhaps not literally ask, but seek your approval at least) a little more than he seems to currently do now with these types of things.

If you're comfortable doing what you do with him, then that's that. If not, be it due to it reminding you of what you went through or anything like that whatsoever, then you have every right in the world to alter your activities with him, and if he cares, he'll understand. I don't think he's going to be angry at you, and I don't think he's going to think you let him remind you of the abusers...and even if he did, I certainly don't think you let him do it on purpose.

I rather feel like I'm rambling in the above paragraph...if I need to clarify anything, please ask.

As for you, I would tell you everyone, man or woman, deserves a good partner, and deserves to be happy.