All I can say about it is that extreme prolonged stress has a cumulative effect. A kind of 'straw that broke the camel's back' effect. I can't point to 'THE' one traumatic event, there's just been too many. The last 'physical' abuse sticks in my mind, when I was assaulted by my son-in-law. The real trauma came when my own daughter accused me of assaulting him. And 20 years later it upsets me more than it did then because I'm reminded every day that nothing has changed and that I lost my entire family because I won't admit a lie just to make them happy. I tried that for the first 10 years of it and it just started all over again, only worse.

I think this "Prolonged stress disorder' or 'complex PTSD' fits me more than the classic Ptsd. I've had 4 generations of this miserable family torturing me for 64 years......oh, yeah, I'm so looking forward to another mothers day alone.

Ok, I'm out of here for the night, I couldn't cheer up anyone! Went outside to work, pulled a big heavy flower pot and damaged a little frog...all bloody, I felt like crap! So then I pull the thing back and mash it's mate! They probably lived there all winter and then along comes Spiderlegs! Been upset ever since.