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May 06, 2012, 08:50 PM
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Member Since: Jan 2012
Location: Somewhere Out there
Posts: 940
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Trippin2.0
Angry, sad, irritated, fed-up! But nobody leaves me alone, they KEEP bugging me, when all I want to do is sleep it off. So then, I yelled at my poor daughter bcoz I didn't feel like making her what she wanted for supper (2 much GD effort) and then my mom gave her what she wanted, and she probly went to bed hurt, I'm hiding with my shame and guilt in my room. Sometimes I question God's motive for putting her in my life, is He trying to show me how badly I suck? I'm honestly no good at being a care-taker. A provider, yes, a listener, yes, a guide or help, yes, that came naturally, but N0T taking care of somebody else 24/7, I'm WAY to self-centered for that. That much is CRYSTAL clear  but I'm stuck at home being miserable, probly making my daughter feel unwanted. God I suck 
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Not looking for pity, just ranting about being inadaquate and the shame that follows. |
No one is perfect girl, just go in there and give her a hug. Tell her you love her and goodnight. That will make you both feel better. Children are resilient and the fact that you worry about your ability to take care of her shows you care. You could be one of the parents out there that dump their kids off with any family member that will take them and just never come back. I have seen it countless times. You are there making an effort and that deserves to be acknowledged. Being a mother is a hard thing to be. Very rewarding at times too. Im no where near a perfect mom but I give it my best and hope that Im doing something right.
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Crystal 
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you have imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe become simple. 
Bipolar 1
OCD
BPD
Anxiety with panic disorder
Agorophobia
viibryd
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