Sounds like your depression still has the best of you and you have yet to find your path out of the darkness that has over taken what was once the happiness and direction in your life. I would suggest that you give the medication a little longer to work (or change it if it is not working) and to seek out a good counselor to help you dig deep into your past to help you deal with all the wounds from your past that are now controlling your present life and every single step you take from this moment on........ Does that make sense?