So I am in therapy for many reasons-I am a trauma survivor. One of my issues that we sometimes talk about is my addiction to porn. We had not talked about it for a long time-I thought T might never bring it up again-WRONG. Tonight he asked about it-and I got so uncomfortable-he would not relent though-he was like who do you talk to this stuff about? I said no one-and he said exactly that's why you talk to your therapist about it-he said by my responses to the issue it is something we need to look at-it causes me great shame and just disgust-and I couldn't even talk to him about why tonight. This was towards the end of a session and we talked about a few small things after and then after our closing prayers-I busted out crying hysterically that I didn't want to leave-that I miss him when I'm not there-I felt like a child. T talked me down and had to get going because his son's baseball game-but he was really sweet about it.

SOooo-my question is-I want to tell T all the things that go on for me surrounding this issue-I want to tell him why I want to stop-I want to tell him that it's difficult for me to talk with him about it because I have thought about him being sexual (not having sex with him-but him doing sexual things) and I'm embarrassed and also feel weird because the transference of a father figure is so strong. I'm tempted to write this in an email to him tonight-but I'm scared do ya'll think it's a good idea? thank ya!