...
But, I feel that the deterioration of my cognitive functioning has progressed rather rapidly and now when I am manic I can't write because I can't hold on to my ideas. I can't sing because the sound of music becomes a muddled mess of noise in my head that makes me want to scream and tear my hair out. I can't draw because my mind is looping so fast all I can do is scribble...
...
So enjoy your gifts as you can use them. I look back at the person I used to be and I didn't even notice it was all slipping away through my fingers. Now I'm just a total mess.