Very good list!
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Originally Posted by WikidPissah
darting every which way in my head to avoid presence.
that I could make eye contact and let him see me.
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This could be related to your self worth? You feel so bad about yourself that his seeing you is a painful reminder of how you feel about yourself? Working on your self worth, and how you got it, would be good stuff to work on.
Quote:
Originally Posted by WikidPissah
that I could lay down the sword and trust a little.
that I would stop worrying about how quickly I can get thru the appointment and relax in the content.
that I would stop holding back info to keep the power on my side.
that I would see him as an ally instead of an enemy.
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I see this as boundary issues? You don't feel that you can protect yourself? Working on healthy boundaries would be good. Recognizing that you are not powerless and that you can protect yourself. Understanding how you got this way would be helpful and working through those reasons.
Quote:
Originally Posted by WikidPissah
that when I think I like him I don't find a million reasons why I hate him.
that I wasn't so hard and calloused that nothing he says can penetrate.
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Relationship issues? Boundaries and self worth would affect this area. Working on the above might help with this.