Quote:
Originally Posted by My kids are cool
I am just feeling so depressed and so worthless.  Just because I feel that way today (and have been feeling down for the last two weeks at least) doesn't mean that I'm falling back into a depression, right? This is just one of those things. My T and I are . . . shoot, I don't know what we are. I still cannot get over being embarrassed and mortified about the discussion a couple of weeks ago. And that discussion was pretty much what triggered this . . . whatever it is. Depressive episode. Let's call it that, rather than depression. The marriage counseling really seems to be hurting rather than helping also. And mother's day coming up. And my mother not calling me ever even when I send up her favorite cookies. And talking trash about me to anyone who will sit still to listen.
But, I can shake this off, right? It's not forever. One foot in front of the other. |
Oh I have been in a similar spot and have made it out the otherside. ( and expect I'll be there again from time to time) ... If only we could see things that others see while we are in the midst of it...
these things I want to say are so easy to say and so hard to do when you are in that "place"... so I will tell you the things I wish I could do and see when I'm in the deep of it...
You know the truth about yourself...you are listening to the lies from the past..past recordings...past thoughts.. You are NOT worthless.. sometimes the "place" we find ourselves are caused by our own "focus"...what are you focusing on?
Your T cares about you. He has proven it over and over again. He can handle the things you said. Oh you might have caught him off guard but he can handle talking about it...
You are a woman of strength... you too (although it doesn't feel like it now) can survive talking to your T about the whole thing. There may be feelings that you have that you are giving too much power because you won't talk about them... maybe it will be one of those situations that while its all in your head it seems so much worse but once you let it out and talk it out with T it won't be...
I'm no professional..just saying some things that I wished someone had said to me and it would have saved alot of heartache that I put myself through.... this depressive episode may "last longer than necessary" because you are keeping all of these feelings locked in... and listening to the bad recordings....lies from the past that we believed..