Abusers are very good at seeming like the one who is actually being abused and neglected.

Lets just think about this on a different level. Many serial killers and even sexual abusers are people that one would never expect to be as bad as they are. There are priests, teachers, doctors, politicians, a quiet neighbor who may even seem like a great family man, a coach for a football team, think about it they have a way of seeming so upstanding one would NEVER suspect who they REALLY are, which are PREDITIORS.

And, it is not unusual for a parent to focus on one child that they abuse either. My therapist told me that they are trying to find out how or what is a deciding factor in how a parent may pick a certain child in their family to abuse. They don't really have an answer to that yet.

And it is not unusual that people will be loyal to an abuser and not see the abuse they cause either. I experienced this myself with a trainer who was abusing his own children. I was the only one (other than my daughter and some students her age that noticed this and found it distubing) others chose to ignore the obvious. I was the only one to leave that trainer and report him. Others chose to deem me a bad person and continued to turn a blind eye, even a minister/psychologist. I can't tell you how shocked I was by that.

The therapist/minister did not listen to me, kept her daughter in training with this trainer who was not only severely neglecting his children, BUT, had the dirtiest foul mind/mouth on any man I had ever met. Example, he taught his three year old son to call his wife a dirty ***** and he thought it was funny. Oh he did much worse than that too. Well this young girl who grew up under that influence was at a horse show down in florida and had a hotel room and decided to have 5 stable hands, one after the other you know what with her. And the trainer thought it was amusing. Oh nice job minister/psychologist, turn a blind eye why don't you.

So, NO, it is not just you. This happens and you have every right to stand up for yourself against abuse, even if it means you are treated like the bad person, which ofcourse you are not.

All I know is I got MY daughter away from this creepy man, MY child learned how to stand up and walk away. It wasn't easy because he stalked her at horse shows and had a student pretend she was from a different barn and got friendly with our daughter on line which led to our computer being hacked.

Luckily for me, other trainers noticed what was going on and thankfully protected my daughter at the horse shows as I had to work constantly to pay for this constant expense and could not always be there. And because I stood up, another trainer noticed abuse too and reported him because he left his down syndrom child locked in his car all day, for hours unattended to a point where this child was covered in his own feeces and crying. This trainer is forever barred from showing at this farm.

I am very sorry that you had to experience this kind of abuse. It is heartbreaking when a parent abuses their own child.

I also agree with Sannah, you COULD tell the truth. However, the truth doesn't always mean you will be believed. There are people who are involved in church communities that can be somewhat blind, thinking that everyone should get along, be forgiven etc. If only we could, but we DO have to take steps to keep ourselves from abusive people. Sometimes knowing that others will not always understand our reality.

(((Hugs))))
Open Eyes