Hi Trinity, kudos for being open and asking these questions. (I love that new avatar, btw!)

I think self-doubts, fears and conflicting learned rules of what to do next are a big part of remaining stuck. As for self-pity, I think that's often an attempt at honest self-soothing coupled with fears of failing or being disappointed or hurt again. It probably includes some buried memories of being kicked when we are feeling down, which everyone experiences in some way at some point.