Newtus, you've already come so far & succeeded. Life is an adventure & unfortunately Schizoaffective is one of them... You can either make it as bad as it feels or you can try & enrich your life while it's still there. It's hard; I know. I've had it extremely bad lately. But life has too much potential to waste it, especially when you've gone through so much hardship. : )

I used to hit myself in the head/face a lot... I called it "Fight Club". Lmao Probably not the right time for it, but the mood needs to be lightened up a bit I think. :P